Periodic Table Puns

Do you think Sodium is some cool dude? Na!

Mother: “Why would you not learn the periodic table?” Kid: “cause it’s so boron, ma!”

Scientist One: Can you see it? Scientist Two: Can’t believe it really existed! Ah! Element of Surprise.

What do you do to a crinkled shirt? Fe (Iron)

There’s one good guy in the periodic table, know who? Samarium

What would you say if you saw Nobelium and Silicon after a long time? Long time No(Nobelium) Si(Silicon)

Emma finally decided to dump her boyfriend, because…She couldn’t barium (bear him).

How did Oxygen and Potassium’s date go? O(Oxygen)K(Potassium).

Boy: Hey girl, you made of Copper and Tellurium? Girl: What? Boy: ‘Cause you are Cu(Copper)Te(Tellurium).

A poor Chemistry nerd’s proposal got rejected, guess why? Because he wrote Iodine Lutetium Vanadium Uranium to a girl, which meant I Luv U.

We tell y’all folks, no matter how smart you are, you must never swank off, especially when the other party has no iota of interest in your turf.

There’s one smart element in the f-block and he is… Einsteinium

What would you call a person with technical affinity? Technetium

Some girls were devastated after today’s Chemistry class, know why? They learned that Iron Man is actually a Fe(Iron) – Male(Man). God no! Chemistry is really twisted.

There’s a man from the big blue planet and he seems famished… Neptunium

What will happen if Iron Man and Silver Surfer decided to come together? They will be allies as well as alloys.

Where do you put your dirty dishes, folks? In the zinc, we suppose.

What do you do with a dead scientist? You barium. That’s if you can’t helium or curium.

A wrestler holding down an opponent may have a NEON him

Two chemists walk into a bar, the first says I will have some H2O and the second one says I will have some H2O too and the second one dies! Hahaha (get it… H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide and you can’t drink it or you will die)

what happened to the chemist in the cave -Berkelium (bear kill him)

Hey want to hear a joke about potassium…………K

You must be ethidium bromide, because I’m tangled in your double helix.

Are you made out of beryllium, ununtrium, and titanium ? Cause you’re a BeUTi ( beauty )

Do particles with multiple helium isotopes have mass? Only the Catholic ones!!

Are you feeling under the weather today? Because you look like you’re Na fine.

Sooo I was gonna tell you a joke about sodium and hydrogen……but NaH

What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together? CSI

What is the chemical formula for “coffee”? CoFe2

What is the chemical formula for “banana”? BaNa2

What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium.

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK.

What is the most important rule in chemistry? Never lick the spoon!

Helium walks into a bar, The bar tender says “We don’t serve noble gasses in here.” Helium doesn’t react.

Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, “AU, get outta here!”

Two chemists go into a restaurant. The first one says “I think I’ll have an H2O.” The second one says “I think I’ll have an H2O too” — and he died.

What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? HeHe

Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar? He got Avogadro’s number!

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